Confidence?

I have been doing covers since back in 2010. I've only did like...4? I'm not sure lol. Anyway, point is, I stopped doing them for a while because people told me I wasn't good enough. I believed them. I mean, sometimes even when you say you don't care what people say about you, no matter how much you try not to care, you will anyway(secretly maybe). AM I NOT RIGHT?

So I just posted a cover of Ed Sheeran-Lego House on my facebook...super worried about it because I haven't posted a cover in ages since I was told I couldn't sing. I know I'm not good enough but at least I try hard right(or maybe not)...

Don't you just hate that feeling of worrying what people think about you and not being good enough and stuff like that? I do... it's just idk man it's like ughhhhh(I DON'T HAVE THE WORDS TO EXPLAIN IT OK).

I watched 10 Things I Hate About You yesterday and I really love the storyline!

"Why should we care what other people think about us? Why should we make them happy instead of ourselves?"-Catarina

I mean honestly I wished I didn't have to care about what people say. If you like it, just do it. But no, unfortunately we all care. Even if we don't admit it. We are all hypocrites. And that is the sad truth...

I was kinda forced into the interclass public speaking competition by Mr Samson D: I haven't gotten my script ready and I am here...typing this post...umm yeah... I don't want to go though. I mean I stutter alot when I'm nervous and I can guarantee I'll be the most person with nerves up there stuttering like there's no tomorrow! Plus it's so much pressure...I mean, I have like exams to study for(which I haven't started by the way and I am freaking out!!!!!!!!), boy problems, magazine committee thing, my weight and health. UGH ITS JUST A BUNCH OF BULLCRAP MAN.

Here are a few of my insecurities and stuff that I'm never confident in:

• My body
• My weight
• My voice
• My face
• My smile
• Studies
• boys
• never being good enough at anything
• I think I have no talent(no I am not joking)

Speaking of, come to think of it...I have no talent... I mean everyone of my friends are good in at least something and here I am, not knowing what I'm good in. Sucks to know that everyone has a solid talent or at least something they're good at! I mean, Ivy has piano and her studies and swimming, Xinjie has dancing, Kak has her first aid stuff and her awesome memory, Bev has her confidence in talking and taking new challenges and what not. Look at me, what do I have? I don't do anything! It's so frustrating growing up sometimes. Specially if you don't know what you're good at. I'm bad at sports. I have asthma. I'm not the best person in studies. I can't dance. I don't look like a model. I'm not confident...

All those "what if's" going through your mind...

Honestly this is just a pointless post don't you think? Aaaahhhhhhh I'm sorry for writing a pointless one. This is just to rant and get stuff outta my mind.


,xx